There is a Time in Every Man's Lice...
This is our Band moment page. Most people, on occasion, do stupid things. We just do them more often then other people.
HOW ADAM (MEST) UP HIS EYE
How did Adam mess up his eye and why are there 14 stiches in his face? Ill tell you how...THE BEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE IS how!!!! Yes I got smacked in the eyebrow by Tony Lovato's (from Mest) guitar that he had thrown to a girl on my shoulder. It was fine untill the blood came and then I started lauging. Some stage guy stole the guitar back from me then hoisted me onto the stage ( Wow, I can't believe I can remember any of this) So Im up there with blood pourin out my fuckin eyeball and Im just like. " wheres my shoe?" Which I had lost while bleeding all over the crowd. So I got my shoe and Im up on Stage with fucking Mest. Come on now people, MEST. yeah thats what I thought. So Im talking to Tony and Jerimiah and Im all lovin the spot light. Then it dawns on me that Im losing about 3 gallons of blood a second out of my face, so I better make this quick. So I tell Tony how I love the band and how I use the same guitar that they use ( Fernandes Native X) And hes like " cool " or whatever. So I get off the stage and I guess the uh...stage guy...yeah sure...the stage guy for Good Charlotte took me out back to GC's bus and I got on and I was talkin to the guys and shit while the dude fixed me up with some bandages. And we are discussing what my benefits will be. So eventually I got a bunch of free shit, we got to go backstage...all 10 of us. I got a moment in the spotlight. And I got to meet all the dudes from mest and GC. So...yeah basically the best night of my life.-Adam
MILK DUD THROWING
Now, this is a game that we made up. It's actually quite simple, and i will first relay to you what it is. Then- a few incidents in which we participated in the phenomenon that is...Milk Dud Throwing.
Milk Dud Throwing is quite simply the throwing of milk duds at anyone or anything, preferably from one moving vehicle to another.But it really does work any way. It started one fine evening about 3 or 4 weeks back when i got off work early. I called up Adam on his cell, who happened to be hanging out with the coolest kid in the world- Brian. They came to pick me up, and from there we proceeded to pick up Arthur. I had taken a box of milk duds from my work place before i got picked up and thinking quickly threw one out the window of Adam's moving car. Seconds later, i heard somewhat of a bang against the mini-van driving by us. Apparently milk duds are rock hard, especially if they are shitty and stale. For the rest of the night, we proceeded to throw milk duds at people and cars, as well as talk to my ex girlfriend's mom, stop and talk to some of adam's hot friends, and attempt to drive on a basketball court while people were playing on it. Needless to say, i believe we started a great thing that hopefully can be participated in by teens all over the world someday. Weeks later, we are still driving around on Saturday nights throwing these shit candies at oncoming cars. -Brandon
SWING WARS
another game we made up, swing wars takes place at the park on the swing sets. we remove our shoes (by the way, all other clothes are required. nudeness is not tolerated until after the game. then- it is encouraged.)well, u know how u go back and forth on a swing? in swing kids u go right and left. 2 people at a time. the other 2 start off the game by pulling the swing back with the contender in it and push them flying into the opponent. from there, the opponents proceed to kick and slap the shit out of each other (no fists allowed. however fisting up the asshole will later be required).whoever falls off first and hits the ground loses. its like a tournament with winner and losers brackets. that whole thing. its double elimination,and the 3 losers or however many people playing that lost have to streak. hopefully, we'll be getting that on video sometime soon. its lots of fun, and maybe some dancing flygirls would be appropriate as well.
-brandon
PLAYGROUND RODEO
this is another game we play at the playground. we get on this little trinket thing suspended to the dirt and we have someone pull it back and forth trying to get us to fly off. its like the rodeo with bull riding or something. n e way i think the record at this point is 4 seconds. -brandon
THE INSTA-COP
Ok, gather round kiddies. I'm gonna tell you a story about our band's most recent mishap. On Saturday, May 5, 2001, the band members(except for Brandon) along with Mark and Brian (two good friends of ours) decided to go over to the park and have some fun. When we arrived there, about 10:00 PM, a man in a silver Lincoln Continental (I think) told us we had to leave because the park closes at 10:00. Pissed off at the guy for making us leave, we drove to 7-Eleven and stole some slurpees. Well, everyone bought theirs but me, which I stole in a little sample cup. So it wasn't actually stealing. Anyway, after I realized I had left the keys in the car with the doors unlocked, we left and drove back to the park. We slowly pulled in, looking around to make sure there were no assholes waiting for us, and then parked and got out. Less than a minute later, the same guy drives into the park, but this time he has lights on top of his car and is in a police uniform. Realizing we had been had by the Police Department, we we're humbled yet pissed at the same time since we had done nothing wrong. Apparently, the cop was parked in the grass in the dark, since there were no lights lighting the park. The thing that bothers me is, he must have changed from the suit he used to be in, to his uniform. Just thinking of that wrinkled middle aged man undressing gives me chills and excites me at the same time. Just kidding. That's where the title for this story comes from, since the man was dressed normally and then appeared again as a cop (hence "Insta-Cop). Anyway, he basically yelled at us and threatoned to blow up our cars and kill our families (standard cop procedure), so we sat on the curb as he interrogated us and called in back up. Finally, my friend Jeff's dad showed up, who is part of the Landsbrook Committee thing (I think), and he talked to us (which was better than the lunatic cop threatoning to know us sexually). Finally, they let us off, but not before giving us a formal warning and deporting Brian back to Canada. That was one of the most scary yet cool incidents for our band, but we'll have to see if it will compare to the Haunted House (coming soon!). - Mike
"I DON'T CARE HOW COOL YOU ARE, YOU DON'T TRY TO CHASE DOWN A CAR"
Ok everyone. Listen in on what quite possibly may be my very favorite band moment. And even though me and Adam have many great times together alone (j/k), this pretty much tops it. Alright heres the deal..Me, adam, and brian drove around pretty much all night. We had bought moonpies from Busch at the gas station earlier in the evening, and proceeded to eat two and save one to throw at someone at some point during the night. Well, the night went on. And we didnt end up throwing it at anyone. We took Brian home and then went to Varsity Club to look for MArci and have some potato skins. It was just after 11, when we left the restaurant and continued over towards Lansbrook to find someone to throw the moonpie at. All the time spent in the car looking for someone to kill via moonpie, was filled with me licking the moonpie to make it even more unpleasant to get hit with. We went through several neighborhoods, and even tried to stick it to Keith's car, but apparently it was in the garage. We were gonna go back to Adams and give up, but i said "hey lets go to golfside" one last time. (By the way, we had been in there on and off all day..and some dude was already pissed enough to stare at us possibly taking down license plate #'s, etc). Oh yeah, right before we went into golfside i got the moonpie soaked in sprinkler water. But anyway, we went back and saw a couple people sitting on the curb, but they looked too nice for me to do it to them. We turn the corner and see this thug looking white dude walking down the sidewalk. We drove past him but then decided to go back and finally do it. So we got up right next to him and i threw it possibly hitting his foot, but maybe not. He didn't seem too pissed at first, but he picked it up and probably smelled the shit sprinkler water and felt my saliva and got pissed. So he yells out something to the extent of "Come back here you mother f'ers" over and over. And then at our most perfect moment he starts chasing after the car! We were laughing so hard and ADam could barely drive. Just the idea of someone running after a car. And right as we pulled out of the neighborhood i say to Adam "You know what, I dont care how cool you are, you dont try to chase down a car". (***FuN fAcT*** this band moment happened on the same street that the reckless endangerment thing happened on ***FuN fAcT***)
-Brandon
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its like an episode of cops without all the heroin
WHO IS TODD AND WHY DOES HE GO PLACES?
Glad you asked. Well this Todd charecter we speak of is an actual person. See Brandon and I (Adam) volunteer for habitat for humanty, and the supervisor there is a man named Todd. Now if you met Todd you would know what the deal is with the name already, but if not we will explain. Todd is not, as we would say, the coolest cat in town. In fact hes kind of one of those Mr. fixit but not very well, loser types. Anyway Brandon and I were once at the movies (we didnt snuggle I swear) and we saw Todd and what appeard to be a female that was intersted in him. This is quite odd due to Todds general lack of shorts that dont hug his ballsack and thought process of a ring talied lemur. We talked for a few moments and went our ways. This is about the time that I turned to Brandon and uttered the phrase...."Todd goes Places?" And that moment went down in history as Fuggin hilarious. It wasnt until we were forced to change our name that we chose what is now youre favorite bands name. Or at least a new name that may be changed in the next 2 weeks due to our general lack of decision making skills
UNDERAGE BICHON
Now this story is kinda sad. It involves the departure of one of our bands dear good freinds and sexual favor groupie Brian. You see Brian is a Canadian...no wait Im not done yet, there were some complications down here and he was forced to move back to Canada. Now this may not have upset us, as many groupies(about...0) have come and gone over the years (months), but we really do love this kid and he is in our love hexagon of best friends. Anyway, to get to the band moment... on the last night that Brian was here 4 of the 5 non canadian best friends went to Brians house for one last hurrah before he was off to the land of snow and french people. We had a blast just talking about old times and making fun of Brians bald Bichon Fries(an ugly ass dog). We basically had one of our best nights together saying our goodbye's. Luckily or young canuck should be back with us by the end of the year if things pan out according to plan. But all the guys from the band would just like to take this time and say...
....."Brian, we love you dude"
"YOU BOYS GET ON OUTTA HEA'"
Ok a while ago, during one of our first "practices" we were driving around Arthurs neighborhood. Arthur went inside to tell his mom what was up and me a Brandon thought it might be funny to start driving away. Little did we know that Arthur is an idiot and wanted to jump on my hood. So as I sped up and braked to try to dislodge the asian terror from my windshield we noticed a fully uniformed cop cradling a coffe mug looking at us from the shadows. He walked over to us and said " How you guys doin?" after profuse apologies from me he said' How bout this: I take you out of the car, arrest you on "reckless endangerment" charges impound your car or sell it at an auction and take away your license till your 21?" Being the scared shitless kid that I am I apologozed and begged him not to do those exact things. After cussing at us for a few more minutes he let us go and we never saw him again. That is until he came down the road 5 minutes later to yell at us for talking to middle schoolers, and once again when he drove by us talking to Natasha (an immensely beautiful cheerleader), so that was a great band moment that I guess could get me in trouble but hey!!, its all in good fun and for the band.( thats also where one of the band name choices comes from.)-Adam
ROLLER CHAIR FOOTBALL
Then on a recent practice with the new dudes, we all decided to take a break from music making. We went out into my living room/kitchen area (Adam's) and played " wheelchair Football". This game consists of as many players as you can find, as long as you have enough roller chairs to go around. Any chair with wheels will do. So we wheeled our way around eachother trowing a small plastic football around. This can be surprisingly fun if you a bunch of goofey idiots such as myself and my bandmates. But hey we had fun and it was all good. Sooooo. Thats it.- Adam
ANAL BUTT SEX
Then another time Keith did some guy in the butt. That really wasnt all that funny. It was kinda gay if you ask me. But hey if you have any questions about keiths lifestyle sign our guestbook and ask him. Hahaha.......just joking hes not gay. Well he might be, but he didnt do a guy in the bum...at least I hope he didnt...ok im grossed out now. Ill stop.
- Adam
Ok i want to clarify that i did not do anybody in the butt. And if you would really like to know, before we practiced the band saw Adam making out with some flamboyant pizza delivery boy. Adam that was gross. But we did get free pizza, so uh good job Adam
-Keith
PURPLE?
Ok, heres all the things that were funny that happend at Busch Gardens recently.(or at least the funniest ones) The first one happend when we first arrived at the park and decided to go on Gwazi. Seeing as how there were 3 of us and only 2 people per row we had to have someone "ride solo". Brandon was the first to go and unfortunatly he wasnt alone. No, in fact he had to sit with a man that noone should ever be forced to stand less than 10 feet from. He had a long wavey mullet, he was greasy and sweaty as all hell, and the worst part was he had a tube top on that said "Jamacia" on it. We looked back after the ride was over to see Brandon curled up with tears in his eyes, and Jamacia with a smug grin on his face. So Mark and I laughed at him for the rest of the time there. so theres number one. Number 2 happend a little while later when we took the skyride(best ride there I might add) over the new Rhino ride or whatever it was. We looked down and say some elephants playing around in the water. Then one big one got up behind another and was giving it to her from behing, ELEPHANT STYLE!!! It was great, Id never seen elephant porn before. So that too was great. But the best part came at the very end of our trip. We went on Montu. We had already been riding the coasters all day so it was nothing new. We went around once and were like, "We got time lets do it again" so we did and sat in the back row. Well all was fine untill we were done with the ride and we pulled up to the little parking spot or whatver it is. Well Brandon turns to me and was like, "Man I dont feel too hot right now". I was like "Now? Weve been doing this all day. Just dont puke on me dude ill beat you." (yes Im a very supportive friend) So anyway there was a gap between him and Mark so I told him to puke over there. Mark and I thought hed be allright till we got off, but we looked over and saw Brandon with his hand over his mouth. We laughed a little. Untill the second time he put his hand up and I guess couldnt hold it anymore. So he calmly turned his head and let loose. I guess he was aiming for the floor, but he has bad aim and only got some on the floor, most of it landed on his shorts and his puma. Mark and I started cracking up and as we were getting off Brandon chunked up a few more for the birdies. So that was great. But the funniest part was that It was all purple. "From what?" you say. Well I dont have the answer. All he had was a hamvburger at lunch. That may have done the trick but that was some chunky shit. It wouldnt come off his pants either. He had to take them off and put them in the trunk on the way home. Which( the ride home) was filled with plenty of laughing at Brandons misfortunes. But hey it made for a great band moment so keep up the good work Suge!!!- Adam
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